Thursday, 22 October 2009

Right now everything is going well. And I am so used to have lots of stuff going so this feel really weird. My life is a constant rollercoaster of emotions. When this happens I usually create little stories in my head to keep my head busy and often I argue with people in my head. I know it probably sound silly but that is what I do. It is like that when everything is quite something is not right. And it is not that I am expecting something to happen. No right now I feel good and quite happy with myself. I know it is not going to last but that is OK. I treasure these moments where everything goes well. And for that I have to thank all of you and my friends that support me. I don't feel on my own anymore.

Jobwise it is not great but things might change soon ... hopefully! So we'll see... So now I focus on my time outside of work and make the most of it.

I am glad that my relationship with my trainer is back to normal. I still have a few things to tell him and will do that on Saturday. I'm not looking forward to it as I hate confrontation and usually would do everything to avoid them. But now I can't. And I know I have to clear the air so it is all out in the open. My trainer already told me that he was happy we told about stuff. So that should make it easy and he knows I haven't finished. And once that is out of the way I can just focus on the training and not think about this conversation we are going to have.

I feel my head is clear again and can just enjoy life again which is a big relief.

Food is OK. Definitely not how it should be but that will come when it will click in my head. I'm still not eating crap or junk but not enough veggies. As I love fruit I have enough of them. Today I had porridge for breakfast and dinner... Today was the first time I had it warm. Usually I just have it cold with milk, seeds and whey protein and I love it. Well I had it warm today and it was ok. But am not too sure how much milk I am suppose to use. It is more filling than having it cold. So might have it again!! I actually love porridge...



FatToLean said...

Why not write down your chat with PT and then keep rewriting it until it comes across as enthusiastic and beneficial to you instead of criticism of him. Would you accept from your mobile phone provider a plan that offered you 800 text and 100 minutes talk when you talked 800 minutes and only text 100. He just has to provide a plan that suits you after all, he is a service like anything else Good luck, hope it goes well tomorrow.

Caroline said...

Yes you are totally right! It is like I am expecting him to know these things. That is a very good idea to write it down. I haven't thought about that...