Monday 31 August 2009

Consequence of bad boyfriend.....!!!!

Today was one of my struggle days because of the consequence of a bad boyfriend!!! I went out with him anout 2 years ago and he was someone who didn't always returned my calls or messages. And now I see how bad he was in communication. As one day he decided to stop talking to me and upto now I still don't know why. I took me a long time to get over that .. about a year or so! Especially as there was no closure to it and I found it very hard. So now when someone doesn't return my calls or my text I get into this angry state and no way I can snap out of it!! The thing I know that everyone has a busy life and it is not always possible to reply straight away. But that is not always enough for me to calm down and be realistic about the situation. And when I get angry I start to be very emotional and start crying. The weird thing about all this is that I am a laid back chilled out person. But when something like that happens then I get really angry. And I hate it so so much. I have been talking to my counsellor about it and I thought dealt with it but obviously it takes time. And I know I am much better now but I am so angry at myself to for not being more relaxed about it. And see why this person hasn't called you back.Because there might be a very good reason why he/she hasn't. But it is so hard for me to deal with it.

Anyway my PT session was cancelled today so decided to go for a run. And it did me loads of good. I did a very hot and sweaty 7.5K. But my God it was so hot. I couldn't believe it!! I thought I was really slow but once I finished I did the same time as when I ran it another day. So I was so happy with myself. And all my anger and frustrations were gone and felt again chilled out! Thank God for that!!

Breakfast: Porridge oats, skimmed milk, sunflower seeds and choc whey protein
Snack: None
Lunch: Omelette made with 2 eggs and 2 egg whites. Gluten free pitta. Dessert: Pomegranate
Snack: Protein shake and apple
Dinner: Tiger prawns with sweet chilli sauce (no veggies ... shocking!!!) But it was so very nice. Dessert: pineapple, apple and lychees
Snack:
Drinks: 4L water & energy drink

Exercise: 7.5K run

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